Just after recording the latest video blog, I got into a conversation with one of my co-workers. He is a grandfather (in his early 50's) and he asked me "What is the role of the grandfather in today's world" This question got me to thinking more specifically about what role the father plays in today's society.
Things have changed dramatically since I was a kid in the 70's and 80's (let me note that I was raised in a single parent home by my mother, my dad and I really did not have much of a relationship).
I take a look at things today and wonder just how involved...really truly involved...fathers are in their kids lives today. Full disclosure, I know that I have many shortcomings when it comes to being a father. Whether it's because of work and my side jobs, distractions elsewhere or me being too self-embodied at times...I am not being the father that I know I can and should be.
Take a look around at teenage boys today...overall the level of respect is gone. No longer do we have the days of sons fearing the wrath of their fathers when they get home from work. You have kids trying to be badder than dad was, or worse (in the case in some less fortunate neighborhoods) kids emulating their father's bad deeds.
It's up to this generation of fathers (and grandfathers) to step up and start making an impact, otherwise the next generations of fathers will continue to spiral downwards. I know a handful of fathers that are doing a great job with their families, handling work, family time and everything else that comes with family life in 2009.
Americans are all too quick to point the blame elsewhere, whether it's TV and movies to music, the schools and the government...but honestly it comes down to what happens at home. God created men to be the leaders in the home, not just in the sense of being the dominant male figure, but also the spiritual leader. How we act is how our sons will act. How we portray ourselves to our daughters...that is the man they will marry.
I have someone in my life that I dearly want to say "Is this what you want your son to grow up to be" or "are you the type of man you want your daughters to marry?"
But first I have to take a step back and ask myself those same questions? The way I am today...is this how I want Noah to be when he is an adult? The man I am now...is this the man I want Mia, Isabela or Alayna marrying?
It all starts at home...with you...the MAN! It's never too late to become a better man, better husband, better father. Take stock in your life as it is today and decide "is this how I want my kids/grandkids to remember me?"
Honestly at this point...today...my answer is no!
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2 comments:
based on the type of father I know you to be, you should approach the man you wrote about in the blog. A gentle rebuke delivered with love and respect will go a long, long way. He might not take it right, but it should sink in.
Thanks Danny.
It's still something I am struggling with.
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